A Field Trip and a Momma Melt Down

I’ve spent her whole life protecting her! I’ve nursed every cold, sat by her side and curled up with her in hospital rooms. I’ve encouraged her when she felt nervous or shy and watched her exceed the limits people have put on her.  I’ve raised her to be kind, respectful, loving and She’s a great kid, with a good heart.   Now she’s getting older and I’m having such a hard time with letting go.  She’s ready for the independence and I know I have to give it to her, but nobody told me it would be so damn hard!

Today she went on her first big field trip, at her new school, without Erich or myself.  I knew she was a little bit nervous, but excited and I didn’t want her to see my anxiety.  We got dressed and she ate a little breakfast.  I brushed her hair and helped her put it up into a ponytail. We talked about the rules and before I knew it she was out the door and on her way to school.

The door closed and I could feel my nerves churning.  My anxiety began to rise and fall like a rollercoaster and I couldn’t breath.  My tear ducts and gag reflexes unleashed on me like a tidal wave.  I was in a full-blown panic attack.  Funnily enough, my head and thoughts were clear… I know she can do this, I need to let her do this, she’s fine, you’re fine, etc… but my body was unleashing all the physical challenges that makes an anxiety attack the unpleasant experience it is.

I knew I couldn’t go into work like this… The tears were rolling down my face, I was an emotional wreck to say the least.  So I called work to let them know I’d be late and headed over to see the one person I knew would get it, the one person who has seen me through all my ups and downs,  someone who has been through it all with me and my three siblings, my mum.

I walked into her house and she could tell right away something wasn’t right.  She looked concerned as she rose to greet me and asked what was wrong?  I unloaded on her and a big smile spread across her face as she opened her arms and said “now you know how I felt those years you were in Italy!”  When I was little my father had taken me for what was supposed to be a two-week vacation, but  ended up being a two-year custody battle for my mum, a story for another time.  She gave me the biggest of hugs and made me giggle cry.  She made me a cup of tea, we talked about everything, she told me about experiences she’d had raising us and we laughed and cried together.  After a few more hugs  I was ready to head to work.

One of the many great thing about Meg’s new school is they kept me updated all day through text messages and even sent me a few pictures.  They told me I could call anytime to check on her, which gives a mom like me such comfort.  I’m please to say I didn’t call, but I did respond to a few texts they sent me.


I couldn’t wait to pick Meg up and hear all about her day and how much fun she had. She was excited to show me the prank snake she purchased with her tickets she won playing video games.  She especially liked a simulation snowboarding game and my heart swelled with joy when she told me she liked being independent, but would like to go back again with her daddy and I to try the bumper boats.  She’s gaining her independence, but she’s still my little girl and I think I will hold onto that for a little while longer. Till next time…

PS If you’re a mom who sometimes finds it hard to let go, don’t appologize for it.  It’s normal and sometimes it’s harder when your child has a disorder they deal with.  I can tell you Epilepsy has been a long hard road for us, with lots of ups and downs.  As long as you recognize and give them the independence they crave and you prepare them for the real world you’re doing a great job! x

I’ve Missed You

What a lovely facebook post I was tagged in yesterday by the lovely Tara Cain over at Sticky Fingers.  It really brought me back to the time when blogging was fun, less competitive and we were just moms with with kids looking for ways to connect with each other, to laugh and cry about all the wonderful and sometimes painful things happening in our day to day lives. Don’t get me wrong I’m not knocking the bloggers who have monetized their blogs, more power to you, I just miss the simplicity of it all.

Nickie from Typecast struck a chord when she said it can still be that, you just have to not care about everything else and just blog.  Thank you Nickie!

So… this morning I got up, grabbed my grumpy mug, my generic kuerig… It’s a HamiltonBeach, but it has Hamilton in the title, that has to count for something, right?  I digress… Where was I? Oh yes! My Natural bliss pumpkin pie creamer, and I decided I was going to say I MISSED YOU!

I don’t know if you missed me, but I really miss the late night writing and waking up to find all the lovely comments of support, making friendships, many of which I still have on facebook.  I find myself smiling and my heart swelling when I see how much our kids have grown and how lovely they all are.  I miss the laughs, the humor and most of all I miss the relief of knowing there were and are moms out there who were just like me!

So what have we been up to these last few years?  Well, I went back to work and I’m currently employed in a high school.  I’m not a teacher, but don’t tell the officer who pulled me over yesterday because he thought I was and decided not to give me a ticket for that reason… I’ll save that story for tomorrow! My husband is still an insurance adjuster, but recently changed companies. Meg is growing up far to quickly and is, as always, my hero!  Daisy our fabulous dog is getting older and likes to hide in the bathroom when storms come, peeking her head out from behind the shower curtain like the nosey neighbor does from behind the blinds.  Finally, we have a new addition to the family… Dave The Diva, our chubby little hamster, who likes to keep me up at night with his squeaky wheel!  I might have to do a blog post about the things you don’t think about when you’re sucked into buying that adorable, fluffy, little rodent!

I know I’ve said it before, reference my last few posts, but I think I’m back! Yep! I think I’m going to give the blogging thingy a go again!  I’m not going to self host or worry about stats and  I might drive Nickie crazy with my poor grammar, but if you’re interested in watching how I slide through life one banana peel at a time (did you like that little nod to my tag line? Yes I’m that corny!) I would love to follow you and if you would like me to follow you put your link in the comments and till next time…

Disclaimer: I was not paid for nor asked to endorse the products in the crappy picture above… you’re welcome Disney, HamiltonBeach, and Natural Bliss!

PS. Thanks Tara for the look back and the reminder of why I loved blogging. *kisses*

PPS. Wow… my blog needs a little dusting!  I may have to give it a face lift!

Come On… We’re Building Lego!

Playing with Meg’s Lego and some photo editing stuff!

Lego

What?

Like you’ve never paused and played with your kids toys before!

No?

*Ahem*

Well… I do! 😉

Seriously though, they never had any cool girly Lego like this when I was younger!

I couldn’t get Meg to touch it when she was little, her fine motor skill weren’t up to par and she had trouble manipulating even the bigger pieces.

Oh how the tides change!

Now she absolutely loves it and she put this little village together in about a week.

lego1

I have to admit I really enjoy it too!   Not to mention it makes for a few fun photos!

Festivals, Pumpkins and Ghouls Oh My!

Halloween is one of our favorite holidays because it’s spooky & scary and there’s always a lot of fun stuff going on!

This weekend, in true fall fashion, we did some pumpkin carving with friends and headed out to some of the local fall festivals!

We can’t wait to go trick or treating on Wednesday, so we’ve been making ghoulish treats, watching the Adams Family, Hocus Pocus, and Spooky Buddies to get us in the Halloween grove!  We’ve also been listening to lots of fun Halloween music and recently added a new song to our Halloween library!  At one of the festivals we went to this weekend there was a really talented local dance studio and they did an awesome ghoulish dance to this song…

Walking on Air by Kerli

Enjoy!

Feeling Blessed

A little while back I happened to be on the Tampa Bay Parenting website, looking for things to do in our area, when I happened across an Enter To Win section!  Curious I clicked on the link and came across a contest called Family Most In Need Of An Adventure!   I thought to myself, we could really use some time away, decided to enter and began to pen our story.  I also learned that if we won our story would be published in the April edition of the magazine, which would give us an oportunity to talk about epilepsy and spread a little awareness to our community! Finally I shared our entry with friends on Facebook and Twitter asking them to vote for our story and boy did they come through!

On March 13th I received this email:

Thanks for sharing Meghan’s story in our Family Most in Need of An Adventure.

It’s my pleasure to inform you that you are the Grand Prize winners of the contest. We are going to feature your story in the April issue of Tampa Bay Parenting Magazine that will include a photo of your family. We have scheduled a photo to be taken of your family at Busch Gardens on Monday, March 19 at 10am. I will give you a call first thing tomorrow morning to confirm that you have all of this information.

Also, someone from our editorial staff will be contacting you tomorrow as well to arrange a phone interview.

I look forward to speaking with you!

At first I was over the moon and quickly headed to Facebook and twitter to thank everyone who voted for our story and then…

My mind began to picture every family ever photographed on a roller coaster and I started to panic a little!

I looked at my husband

 “Oh My God what if they want us to take a picture on a rollercoaster?”

My husband laughed and told me to relax they weren’t gonna put us on a rollercoaster and went on to mumble something about me over thinking things.  He was right the next day the editor called me and informed me we’d be having our pictures taken at the Busch Gardens Animal Care Center on March 19th, which just so happened to also be my hubby’s birthday.

On the day of the photo shoot we arrived at Busch Gardens and were taken to the Animal Care Center where we met David Estevez (TB Parenting Magazine’s Editor), the photographer and Jose Dominguez from Busch Gardens.  We were given Busch Gardens Aprons and the photo shoot was underway! Jose  introduced us to Burko, the Australian Cuscus and cut up fruit for Meg to arrange on a platter!  We had so much fun!

After we were finished with the photo shoot we were told Busch Gardens would be sending us our prizes in the mail and we said our goodbyes!  We had arranged for Meg’s cousins to meet us at the park because we thought we were getting our passes that day and Meg started to get a little upset because she didn’t think we were going to be able to stay at the park.  I wish I could remember the girl’s name at Busch Gardens, but I went back and explained our situation to her and she was amazing! Within a few minutes she got the okay and gave us instructions on where we could pick up our complimentary day passes!

We had an awesome day at the park and we’d like to send out a big Thank You to Tampa Bay Parenting magazine and Busch Gardens for the opportunity to get away as a family and just enjoy ourselves!

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I feel like in the last month there have been a lot of great things happening for us, so this week I picked an old song that kinda summed things up for me!

Enjoy!

Sunday Snapshot – Straight Out Of The Camera!

Yesterday we were going to head to the bookstore but wound up hanging out at my mum’s house!  I love her garden almost as much as the kids do and it was a gorgeous day out!  Mum gets lots of birds and squirrels that are fun to take pictures of and I keep playing with the ISO on the camera to try to capture some water shots of her fountain (still working on those)!  So here are a few of the shots I took yesterday unedited and straight out of the camera!

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 Sunday Snapshot

Sunday Snapshot